Flirting With the Dark Side: Sug and I Try Schooling Cross Country

Warning: You know I tend to be wordy, but this one goes on and on and on.  You might want to get another cup of coffee or some wine (depending on where you are in your day) before settling in to read this. Just sayin'.

I've been intrigued by eventing since I was a little girl.  I think when I was around 11 or 12 my parents brought me to see the Essex Horse Trials at the USET headquarters in Gladstone.  I can still remember seeing Bruce Davidson and being completely starstruck.  I can also remember having mononucleosis the summer of 1984 and being glad of it because it meant I could watch TV all day and that meant I saw almost all of the limited equestrian coverage.  I remember watching the eventing and thinking, "Dang, that looks really cool, " at the same time I thought, "Dang, that looks scary as heck."

I started riding in the hunter and equitation divisions as a kid, and then when I became a re-rider several years ago, that's what I went back to.  I got involved in the jumper divisions because Sugar was a jumper when I got her.  She was the right horse for me, so I just decided to do what she was good at.

That being said, I've always believed in taking the horses out of the ring. I love galloping or schooling in fields, and exploring trails.  I think it's good for the horses, both mentally and physically, and it's good for riders to learn how to function outside of a perfectly manicured environment.

So when I had an opportunity to go cross country schooling with the evening trainer at my barn the other day, I took it.  Virginia Jenkins Rowsell is an Advanced eventer, who was part of the winning 1993 team gold at NAYRC as well as winner of the individual gold there.  She's also won the Essex horse trials and at Morvnn Park, and probably a bunch of other places that Google hasn't told me about.  In any case, if anyone could get me around a cross country course, even a small one, she could. So I got myself a vest, rationalizing the expense by telling myself it was also a good safety measure considering all the hunter paces I do.  I felt pretty Xena Warrior Princess as I wore it around to break it in, telling friends and family to "Go ahead! Hit me!"  Some of them were only to happy to oblige...

Getting fitted for a vest by Sarah Jane at my local Dover Saddlery.
Do they come with a "No Muffin Top" option?

As the appointed day got closer, I began to over-analyze things.  What the hell was I thinking?  I'm 44 and the Sainted Mare is 18. Were we the proverbial dogs trying to learn new tricks?  I can barely find a distance in the aforementioned manicured ring over featherweight poles - what in God's name made me think I could do so over varied terrain with solid obstacles?? I have a crisis of confidence each time I approach an oxer, what would I do when faced with a Trakehner?

Then (and this was the height of stupidity) for some reason I decided to watch the footage of the 1976 Montreal Olympic eventing competition at Bromont.   I watched that with one eye closed, wincing and cringing and occasionally gasping loudly as one by one horse and rider teams came to grief at various obstacles.   

However, despite serious misgivings and fears of grievous bodily harm when the day came I found myself loading Sugar on my friend Mary-Ann's trailer and heading over to the farm we were schooling at.  This farm was seriously gorgeous, to the point that when we turned down the drive both our jaws fell open in shocked appreciation (Jealousy? Lust?)  I mean, the barn was bigger than my house.  Hell, the tack room was bigger than my house.  Sug came off the trailer and looked around with interest. Once she'd done a quick perusal and noted that everything met her standards, she pricked her ears and studied the field with the cross country course, almost as if she was trying to figure what wild hair Mom had gone and grown now.

Let me tell you, the Sainted Mare was jazzed to be out in that field.  Her head was up, her ears were up, and she moved out in the brilliant floating trot she gets when she's having fun and feeling good. we trotted around, getting a good gander at the fences, and then picked up the canter to do a large loop around the field.  Her Majesty was feeling sassy, shaking her head a bit and threatening to throw in a happy buck or two.

We started jumping over a little vertical, then going down a small incline then galloping down to a log, turning around and galloping back up the incline to pop over an oxer.  Okay, sounds easy, but if you're used to going on flat, perfectly manicured footing, well then, galloping on grass and going up and down hills is a whole 'nother thing altogether!  Then we went up the oxer, down the vertical and the log, then around and up another hill to jump another log that set right up on the lip of the hill.   Again, you don't see a lot of this stuff in show jumping (unless of you spend lots of time in Spruce Meadows or Hamburg) so I was operating on a wing and a prayer. Sug, bless her heart, thought this was all great fun and figured things out despite whatever I was doing on her back.

We went up and down hills, and jumped things going both and down.  We jumped logs, both singly and in stacks.  We slalomed in and out of trees as we navigated through the courses we were given. We even jumped a ditch, which went a heck of a lot better than I thought it would.  The ditch came in the middle of the course and I'd wanted to jump it by itself first. "Nope, you can do it, " said Virginia as she told me to sit back and slip the reins.  At least, I think she said that - she told me to lean back and slip the reins a few times.  That's another thing -- she kept telling me to go with a longer rein, which went totally against my jumper training.  Virginia said if I didn't I might end up on Sug's neck or falling out the front door if she pecked or needed to put her head down to balance herself, so out of the sheer will to live I figured I'd listen to Virginia.

The most entertaining part of the afternoon came when we got to the water obstacle.  If you've been following AWIP at all, you might recall that the Sainted Mare is highly aquaphobic.  She's been known to go wheels-up if there's a puddle in the wash stall, so I was anticipating a discussion at the water. Sug didn't disappoint. She refused to get within 10 feet of it at first, wheeling and backing and hopping up and down.  We tried for about 5 minutes to convince her to get close, but she wasn't having it.

This was taken after we had a 20 minute discussion.
Clearly she still thinks there are alligators in there....

Mary-Ann and her horse Bene then tried to give us a lead.  We tried this from a standstill near the water, then following at a trot and then approaching the water.  Nothing doing.  Just when we were about to call it a day and watch while Mary-Ann and Bene schooled the water, Sug decided she'd better go ahead and humor us and leapt into the middle of the water, gathered herself, and leapt out of it.  There was much fussing and patting and we then went back and forth through the water until we could do it without any fussing.  Then we tried jumping a stack of logs, followed by a slight back and then down through the water and then up a small hill to a log.  The first time we attempted it Sug saw the water on the other side of the logs and said, "Oh, HELL no!"  I circled her, sat in the back seat and rode defensively as I was told, and we went up, over, throughout the water and up over the log like we did it every day.

This is how we looked:

Not too shabby, huh?? (Can I tell you how may times I've watched this video?  Like, a thousand!)  Doesn't she look like a good eventing pony??  After we confirmed her at the water, we tried jumping up and down banks, starting with little ones and getting a little bigger each time.  The first time she jumped up we were both a little shocked, and she kinda got caught up and I got my teeth rattled a bit. We recovered and managed to jump down the down side, which went fairly well.  Virginia and I expected her to give a great big old leap out into space, but she just popped down that bank, easy peasy, which Virginia said shows how smart she is. (Virginia was promoted to Most Favored Person after that comment.)

So that was it.  Our big foray over to the eventing side of the equestrian world.  I'm so glad I tried it. Screwing up my courage and jumping cross country obstacles made me feel all kinds of badass, which will hopefully make me more confident in my show jumping.  Plus, learning how to ride and jump over varied terrain is really good for you- I felt super solid in the tack the next time I popped over some fences in our ring.

Who knows - this may be the start of something special.

Thanks for reading!

Video Cuteness Alert: Sugar Says Hello

I travel for business a lot, and while of course I miss my family (I do, I swear it!) I reeeaallllly miss Sugar.  You know how that is. Not only are our horses our dear friends, but let's face it, they're also our sanity.

I've been away on business trips a lot this year, and my husband has taken to texting me pics of Sug with little messages saying "hello" or that she misses me.  This week he outdid himself.  Check it out:

OK, I know darn well she's not nickering to say hello to me. She's happy to see "Daddy" because he gives her treats and takes her grazing and never makes her work. I don't care, though, because when I'm away I can watch this video and see those beautiful eyes and hear that throaty rumble of a nicker and all will be right in my world.

Thanks for reading!  Hope all is well in your world with your family - both two-legged and four-legged.

Whistle While You Work. I Dare You.

I might be late to the party because apparently this has been around since 2009, but I saw it on the United States Pony Club Facebook site today and it's too darn good not to share!

I've had a mare for some time now and although cleaning her lady bits ain't fun, it wasn't until we leased James that I was reminded how nasty willy washing can be.  That being said, I never though to write an ode to it to help pass the time, à la Disney's Giselle in Enchanted or the Seven Dwarves in Snow White.

Holy smokes, sportsfans, it's a Ding-Dong-Sing-A-Long!

Until I saw this, I thought the funniest thing I'd seen regarding sheath cleaning was my very proper Mother's face when she stopped by the barn one day and found with my arm up to the elbow in my gelding's junk.

That might be a close second to this.

Go ahead, tell me that's not going to be in your head all day.

You're welcome. :)

BWAHAHAHAHAHA! One For The Bucket List!

This was the last image I saw before turning out the light last night.  I'd been paging through my new issue of Horse International magazine and lo and behold, there it was!  And I thought, "Sweet nine pound Baby Jesus!  THIS is one for the bucket list!  I might never be able to actually ride at the All England Jumping Course at Hickstead (what with being an amateur and the whole wrong side of the pond thing), but THIS is something I could pull off and at the same time say I'd competed on those hallowed grounds."

So here you go, donkey chariot racing at Hickstead, courtesy of Horse and Hound:



While I was searching for the video above, I came across something a little closer to home that takes the whole competition a step further.  This footage was shot at Equine Affaire in Massachusetts in 2009.  I try to schedule a business trip to Massachusetts every year around Equine Affaire - how the heck did I miss this???  Hoping it's on the schedule this year, as I need to figure out a way to get involved!



Anyway, there's your Hump Day giggle.  Don't say I never gave you anything!

Holy Flying Feathers!

OMG, one of my Facebook friends posted this and I had to share.  If this does not put a smile on your face, well, I'm at a loss.

How can you not smile at the sight of a herd of Shires galloping down a race track, feathers a'flying?

The gentle giants were ridden by professional jumps jockeys (a bit different from a normal day at the office for these boys, I'd wager) and the race was put on to raise awareness of the Shire breed, which is considered "at risk" by the Rare Breeds Survival Trust.

Congrats all around to Joey, the winner, and all his connections.  To read more about the race, and to see adorable pics of the big horses getting all dolled up for the big event, click here.

Goat Rides Horse. Really. I'm Not Joking.

Okay, so maybe "riding" is a generous term in this instance.

The video is part of an effort to promote tourism in Newfoundland and Labrador, (not the dogs, the Canadian province) where, we are led to believe, fantastically cool things like equestrian goats exist.  This is a pretty big deal for a place that, other than boasting it's own time zone, hasn't seen much excitement since Lief Eriksson beached himself there sometime in the 11th century.

When accused of staging the video, the film crew making the tourism spot affirmed that they'd spotted the duo while going about their official job.  They approached the owner of the farm where the animals resided and she allowed them to film. According to the farm owner, Sunshine, the horse,will lay down and the nimble little pygmy goats use that as an excuse to play 'King of the Mountain' until Sunshine tires of their antics and "gently" bucks them off. 

No harm, no foul, according to the animal's owner. 

I have no trouble believing this could be real.  Have you ever seen goats up close?  They're nimble and curious little buggers, and will climb anything.

Also,  google "Goat Rides Horse."  Looks like there are any number of nubile Nubians looking for a little giddy-up action.

Happy Monday! A Little Video Humor to Start the Week...

It's Monday.  I don't know about you, but I'm sensing this one has the potential to be a looooooooooong one, if you get my meaning.

Therefore, I am building in a stress reliever to aid in dealing with the "Crap, it's Monday" blahs.  Check out this video and tell me if you don't giggle a bit.

Just in case it might be a particularly rough Monday for you, I'm throwing in a bonus video.  Who can resist cute and cuddly kittens? Certainly not me! 



There!  You're smiling now, right? Good.  My work here is done.

Have a great Monday, my friends!  

And Today's Grab Your Kleenex Moment Is...

You may have seen this video floating around on the web somewhere.  If you haven't, take a moment to watch it all the way through.  The key piece of information that transforms this from a cool "girl trains horse" video into a "Holy Crap, I need some Kleenex!" video is about halfway through.

Kinda brings the point home about the importance of time and trust, not just in our equine partnerships, but in all our relationships.  You could also argue that it makes a good point about what exactly makes our equine partners "useful." 

Maybe that's the wrong word.  What I'm getting at is this: Sometimes if a horse doesn't tick all the boxes perfectly, he's deemed as unsuitable.  Granted, Stormy's case is an extreme situation, and it's not every horse person that could and should train a horse with a serious issue.  However, maybe we have a horse that can no longer do what we got it to do.  Perhaps, before we say our friend is no longer suitable, maybe we just need to realign our priorities and goals, and take a look at what may still be possible.

Anyway, I thought this was a pretty darn inspirational and thought-provoking video.  I hope you think so as well.

Coolest Gadget Ever - The Helmet Helper!

Sometimes you get your giggles in the strangest places, you know?

If you've been following AWIP for a while, you may have seen this post where I consideredintimidating the younger competitors in the jumper ranks by wearing a spiked helmet like this:



Scary spiked helmet designed to intimidate pre-fetal jumper types.



This little beauty came across my desktop today and I was instantly in love with the concept. 

I mean, think about how many ways you could use the "Gooseneck" alone! No more transferring the reins to one hand and then reaching back with the crop.  Nope!  One quick twist of the neck and you're all set.

Can you envision jumping a course with this thing?  That oxer look a bit high to you?  Just use the old "Gooseneck" to pluck that nasty top rail off and over you go!

Barn chores would be done in a jiffy.  Imagine - you could clean stalls while filling water buckets.  Eat lunch and clean tack at the same time -- just put a slice of pizza in the "Gooseneck" and hang your bridle from the "Spike."

I am sooooo getting myself one of these babies!

(With thanks to Lexicon Technologies, IT maintenance solutions providers and makers of the Helmet Helper.)

Astounding Cute Horsie Video Post...

Okay, I saw this on Facebook yesterday and had to share with everyone, as it's quite possibly one of the cutest videos of a horse every viewed by humankind.  Really, don't you just want to hug the bejeepers out of this creature?

Without further adieu, I give you:

The Wonderful World of Taffy

<iframe width="560" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/HrkZa_O-XEg" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

On a side note, I am woefully embarrassed at what it says about me that I spend more time on Facebook than CNN. Sigh.

Olympic Pentathlon: A Possibilty?

Olympic fever is alive and well at my house.  My husband and I were swimmers in college, so we always watch as much as we can off the pool action. I will watch any Olympic sport, although of course I have been getting up at o' dark thirty the past two mornings to catch as much equestrian coverage as I can.

The other day the kids and I were joking about what Olympic sport I could possibly still have a shot to qualify for.  God bless Hiroshi Hoketsu and Ian Millar; they give me hope that I'm not to old to dream about an competing in equestrian.  I'd probably be better off if I stopped this jumping silliness and focused on dressage. If I use 71 (Hoketsu's age) as a benchmark, I've got roughly 30 years to practice.

Swimming is out.  I'm not Dara Torres, who at age 43 attempted to qualify for the 2012 Games, which would have been her sixth Olympics. She missed her goal by nine-hundredths of a second (0.09). I was never more than adequate at the sport.  If my team needed an extra body in a relay, they'd throw me in.  Not really the base you want to try and build an Olympic bid on.

Long story short, I decided I might have a shot at pentathlon.  I can swim, I can ride, I can shoot.  I can also run.  I just can't run well.  I used to date a fencer.  That gives me a head start on that, right?? 

Then I saw this video on Horse Nation this morning:

http://s252.photobucket.com/albums/hh27/Xenomorphic_2008/?action=view&current=video-2012-07-25-09-48-16.mp4

Meh.  Maybe not.

In the "Holy Crap!" Category: A Jumping Simulator?!?

Yep, I need me one of these!

Today's "Holy Crap!" Category entry comes with many thanks to AWIP commenter fiberchick for bringing this amazing technology to my attention.  She's right, this would be a waaaaaayyy better purchase than that Korean rider/exerciser (seriously, what does one call that thing?) from yesterday's post.

This is the Jumping Simulator from Racewood Equestrian Simulators, a company that began in 1990 when its founder Bill Greenwood developed an Equiciser (now we have a name for it!!) to help a leading jockey stay fit as he rehabbed from an injury.  The company has since developed and patented fully interactive simulators for dressage, polo, jumping, and disabled riding groups.

Racewood's Jumping Simulator can walk, trot, canter, gallop and jump. You can also use the programmable options to tell the simulator to refuse a jump and/or fall. I guess this is a nice option if you happen to be an adrenaline junkie or of a masochistic bent, but really?1?  I'd be using this thing to get my jumping mojo back, not to create additional opportunities for equine-derived injuries, simulated or otherwise.  I guess it would be helpful in terms of practicing safe bail-outs and whatnot, but really, I could down a couple of Bud Lites and find the nearest mechanical bull for that.

The Simulator can be set for Cross Country or Show Jumping, and gathers information from pressure sensors on the reins, stirrups, neck, saddle and legs and displays the feedback for the rider, alerting him to changes in balance or pace.

How cool is this thing???  I'm thinking I just found the perfect Christmas present!!!

Finally!! Somebody Believes Riding Is Exercise!

At least I think that's what I'm getting from the video below.  Sadly, I'm not fluent in Korean.  Doesn't matter.  I laughed so hard when I watched this video my drink came out my nose.

Awwww Alert. Cute Video of the Sainted Mare.

One of the bestest things about Sug is that she takes such good care of us.  She clearly views me as the Village Idiot, and sees her job as that of minimizing the damage I might inadvertently cause.  She very obviously sees my children as her foals, and you can tell she is determined to co-parent them to the best of her ability.  When we come into the barn, she will nicker at them in her low rumble until the come to her stall and say hello.  When I take her out of her stall, she will stop by the kids and lick them, almost as if she is inspecting them and checking to see if I've kept them in good shape.

I was noodling about watching some of my saved videos and came across this old one.  If you've been following AWIP for a while, you may have seen this before, so I offer my apologies for that.  I just felt like posting it again, as it shows so well why we call Sug the Sainted Mare.

Enjoy, have a great weekend, and again, thanks for taking time out of your day to hang out with us!

Maybe You Should Keep Your Day Job, Malin...

Malin Baryard Johnsson

A friend of mine just sent me the link to this video, apparently an attempt from Swedish showjumping star Malin Baryard Johnsson to jump from the equestrian arena into the world of music with Swedish collective Spånka NKPG.

Umm, I don't know what to say.  Forget that, yes I do: I'm flabbergasted. Gobsmacked. Horrified.  Malin, sweetie, what in the name of heaven were you thinking??  Were you sniffing Absorbine fumes??  Hitting the Brännvin a little too hard?? (Note: I am by no means insinuating that Malin has any substance issues.  This is an attempt at humor, for heaven's sake. Really though, something had to be behind a dubious decision like this!)

I love this woman's riding, and have enjoyed watching her re-emergence at the top after the retirement of the wonderful Butterfly Flip with her new partner, the Lux Z stallion H&M Tornesch.  Her singing, if one can call it that, I'm not a fan of.

At first impression, based on the fashions, I thought this was an ad for her sponsor H&M.  I mean really, who mucks a stall wearing all white???  Then the penny dropped -- this was no ad.  This was supposed to be music!! 

Entitled Do You Wanna Ride, it's got a bit of a dance hall/bad elevator music feel to it. The lyrics are a crack-up: "Do you wanna ride, Do you wanna ride, Do you wanna ride, I love horse."  And who could forget that transcendent line, "Horse are my fetish."

Oh....my...word.  Honestly, I would kill to ride any of her her horses, although I'm relatively certain that's not what the lyrics are really alluding to.  I would also love to find a browband like the one on the gray in the beginning of the video. 

Malin, I love ya -- I'd give my eyeteeth to ride with the style you do.  A word of advice, though: If you wanna sing, do it in the car, preferrably with the windows up.  Just saying...