A Little Laugh at "Horse Show Nerves"...

My barn buddies and I often talk about how we were fearless as kids.  What?  Sent into panic attacks by the thought of a horse show?  Are you crazy?  We'd show our horse, our friend's horse, and that bronc that had hospitalized 3 people and we'd never think twice about it.

Now the very thought of a horse show has us reaching for the Xanax (Valium, wine, insert sedative of choice) and writing lists that are three pages long in hopes of calming our nerves by combating the effects of Adult Onset Dementia.  You know the list I'm talking about.  The one telling you to remember your Xanax, insurance card, show clothes, extra contact lenses, helmet, phone (so you can take a picture of your course), ice bags, Advil, and Ace bandages.

As a "responsible" adult,  we fear everything.  We worry that we're not prepared, that we won't ride well, that our butt looks big in our breeches, or (GASP!) that we'll have one of those dreaded GPS moments and wind up yelling frantically to our trainer, "Which one is it?  Crap!  Which one do I jump next?!"

Yeah, okay, as fears go, it's not the end of the world.  Frankly, getting eaten by a shark ranks higher on my list of crappy things that could happen.  Still, every time there's a horse show you can find at least one of us sitting in the trailer practicing our yoga breathing.

My barn buddies are off to HITS-on-the-Hudson this week.  I'd like to send them off with my best wishes for good luck and good weather, and (hopefully) a little giggle. 

Here's my take on Horse Show Anxiety.  Clearly it's meant for jumpers, but could be appropriate for dressage and eventing with a few tweaks.



(Full credit and apologies to David after Dentist and whoever came up with the Finals meme.)